So everyone knows the general plot of Harry Potter, but take a look at my version of the events of each film. This is from a slightly skewed shippers perspective. Please keep in mind this is a parody and no offense is meant to any of the actors and/or characters. There is also some bad language and adult themes that you may want the kiddies to stay away from. Contact me with comments and/or criticism. I hope you enjoy!

"Oh ...this is going to be awkward."	"Yeah... see, um, I'm the one who got you down here."	"Wha???!"
"I'm actually Lord Voldemort."	"Say WHA??!"	"Yes... you see, my name is a code. If you use certain letters from my name, it spells out...
"I made real love die"	"What the Hell's that supposed to mean?"	"I am the one that will kill you and keep you away from your true love! It's my destiny!"
"Hermione?! No!"	"Yes, the mudblood!"	"So it was you that's been petrifying people! You that's been smashing the pumpkins everywhere! It was you who let the snake loose! But, how... how did you get it down here? How has it stayed alive?"
"Oh, well, he's been eating one of the Hufflepuffs every day to survive... no one really notices them."	"You attacked her... you're the one who tried to kill her!"	"No, her being attacked was an accident. She is meant to stay alive at all costs. But, somehow, she'd already figured out our plans before we'd even finished making them. She saw us at one of our meetings and told us she'd rather die than than to see our end game carried out. So she searched out the basilisk, welcoming its icy glare."