So everyone knows the general plot of Harry Potter, but take a look at my version of the events of each film. This is from a slightly skewed shippers perspective. Please keep in mind this is a parody and no offense is meant to any of the actors and/or characters. There is also some bad language and adult themes that you may want the kiddies to stay away from. Contact me with comments and/or criticism. I hope you enjoy!

Dumbledore must be trying to light his bong again...	Oh no... not the flying WB...	Land of unimportant plotlines we usually don't care about....
....until today.	Now this is a plot an old perve like me can get into.	Important Tip: If your Uncle keeps sneaking into your room in the middle of the night to watch you masterbate... just run away!
This is highly disturbing. I'm very uncomfortable with this.	"As am I."	Perve!
Oh my God... Harry's penis glows!	It really is a magical world!	Obviously, Harry is missing Hermione terribly.
'Lumos Maxima'?	Yeaah, I think something's maximizing...	...but it ain't his wand.