So everyone knows the general plot of Harry Potter, but take a look at my version of the events of each film. This is from a slightly skewed shippers perspective. Please keep in mind this is a parody and no offense is meant to any of the actors and/or characters. There is also some bad language and adult themes that you may want the kiddies to stay away from. Contact me with comments and/or criticism. I hope you enjoy!

"Pppotter! Is it true you fainted? You little pppansy boy...."	Ahh yes. Malfoy's back for yet another year of spitting and and threatening Harry because he's an insecure little git.	But with Dobby gone, he hasn't learned how to gel his own hair.
So it looks less evil.	But he compensates by spitting more.	"Seriously? You actually fainted?"
"Hey Malfoy... your father still wearing a bow?"	[. . .]	"Good one, baby. Don't worry, I'll get him later."
New!Dumbledore begins his start of term speech....	"Welcome to another year at Hogwarts!"	"Where I hope not to get too many of you killed this year."
[. . .]	[. . .]	"But I'm not promising anything..."
[. . .]	[. . .]	[ !!!!! ]