So everyone knows the general plot of Harry Potter, but take a look at my version of the events of each film. This is from a slightly skewed shippers perspective. Please keep in mind this is a parody and no offense is meant to any of the actors and/or characters. There is also some bad language and adult themes that you may want the kiddies to stay away from. Contact me with comments and/or criticism. I hope you enjoy!

"Oh you know...blew up my aunt, uncle was sneaking into my room at night...the usual. And you?"	"Got boobs."	"Good job!"
[. . .]	"Well you know, I had an interesting summer too, I..."	"Did you buy that cat?"
"Yes, isn't he brilliant? I was going to name him 'Harry', but that just confused him when I talked about you to him..."	"..I ...I have this rat, you know..."	"...So I named him Crookshanks. Have no idea why. But he'll become important later in the movie. And he loves you. I've taught him well."
Awww.	"Hey there, Harry!"	[. . .]
Holy Crap!	Big Daddy Weasley's been hitting the Atkins diet!	He's like Hot Daddy Weasley now!