So everyone knows the general plot of Harry Potter, but take a look at my version of the events of each film. This is from a slightly skewed shippers perspective. Please keep in mind this is a parody and no offense is meant to any of the actors and/or characters. There is also some bad language and adult themes that you may want the kiddies to stay away from. Contact me with comments and/or criticism. I hope you enjoy!

Malfoy "Oh look, it's my favorite couple."	Hermione "Shut up Malfoy. The prophecy will never happen!"	"We'll see. What's the matter Weasley? Upset because you've just realized you'll never be able to afford a nice house like that one?"
Hermione "What's the matter Malfoy, couldn't borrow your dad's bow?"	"How dare you speak to me!"	"Even though I secretly love you and the only reason I'm mean to you is because it's what my father and Voldemort want from me and I'm threatened by your beauty and intelligence."
"So shut it!"	"Besides, Daddy is on his way back from the Good Ship cruise and he's going to cause all kinds of problems for you."	snowball hits malfoy [. . .]
"What the...???"	And even though they're surrounded by magic and ghosts at school, Malfoy is scared off by...	...some snowballs.
Scaaaary snowballs.	Harry "What an idiot. Oh Ron, hi. When did you get here?"	distressed Ron [. . .]