So everyone knows the general plot of Harry Potter, but take a look at my version of the events of each film. This is from a slightly skewed shippers perspective. Please keep in mind this is a parody and no offense is meant to any of the actors and/or characters. There is also some bad language and adult themes that you may want the kiddies to stay away from. Contact me with comments and/or criticism. I hope you enjoy!

Later that night, Ron has a bad dream.	"Ahhhh no! Bring it back, all of it!"	"You okay?"
"It was horrible. They destroyed the whole plot... took all my lines... some Mexican guy with ridiculous hair..."	"You get that Mexican, Ron."	"Yeah."
Later, Ron is attacked by Sirius Black!	shot of dumbledore's hands touching painting And the Fat Lady is Slashed!	harry "Oh Jesus, NO!"
"I know the Fat Lady's been slashed!"	"No, it's not that. Did you see his fingernails???"	"Holy Christ."
So Dumbledore, instead of, you know, sending the children home for safety reasons, decides that having them sleep in the Great Hall in magic sleeping bags is safe enough to stop an insane mass murderer.	door locking There's been an insane killer on the loose for weeks and they're just NOW locking up?	Good job, idiot.